Pony News: How To Bar Trot

Brony Bar Trot 2016 CollageThis year marks my second Brony Bar Trot during BronyCon.  It’s the fourth Trot so far, not too shabby considering BronyCon is celebrating its fifth anniversary, no?

I’ve gone “regular” and I’ve gone “VIP”.  And honestly?  Even though this year’s Trot didn’t include the free three-shooter tickets as have been included in the past, I didn’t miss ’em.  But hello sweet VIP commemorative t-shirt! So go VIP if you don’t want to think about what/where to eat, and figure you want another pony shirt to add to your pile.  This year it was an extra $20 to upgrade to VIP grub & shirt.  I could handle that.

Want to know what to do next year?  Dying to see how the other pony half lives (read: how the drinking poinies get down)?  Herewith, a step-by-step guide to how to get your Brony Bar Trot on, in easy-peasy bullet-point format because I’m kinda hungover for easy reading!*

  • Walk over to Fells Point.  Or, take the free Circulator (Orange line to Harbor East, walk on Alicianna to Broadway) and cut some of your walking time.  Gauge the heat/amount of fresh air you’re down with.
  • Hit Dogwatch Tavern, the check-in spot for all Bronies.  Get your handy-dandy wristband, and if you’re VIP, get shown to the VIP area to pick up munchies & your t-shirt.
  • Admire the sweet t-shirt.  Check sizes – the folks who run the Trot are happy to hold up any size you like to make sure you get the one you love best.  [NOTE: the later you check in, the more likely it is that your dream size may not be available.  Trot accordingly.]
  • VIP?  Get down with the free grub.  It’s actually pretty good, and there’s plenty to dig into even if you don’t show up right at the start.  Save room for the cookies. [NOTE: if you’re veggie, understand 90% of said grub is meaty.]
Half of the grub on offer. This pic? An hour and a half into the Trot. (Not pictured: the warm food, like meatballs & wings.)

Half of the grub on offer. This pic? An hour and a half in. (Not pictured: the warm food, like meatballs & wings.)

  • Keep an eye out for the lovely and super nice Bar Trot gals – they may give you free
    Brony Bar Trot free pony

    2016: free pony beer. Get it? GET IT?

    beer.  SRSLY.

  • Check out drink specials.  It’s a Brony Trot, so expect lots of pony themed booze.  Not everything is tasty, but most are.
  • Head out to Trot.  Take a look at the bars on offer, and decide where to go.
  • Or, just do what all the cool kids do; make a quick trip around, grab some grub, then park it at the Admiral Fell Inn for the duration.  Bartender Steve is the coolest, and he really does the Pony Drink proud.
  • If necessary, wait for Steve’s most popular Trot drink: The Great And Powerful Trixie (aka the GPT).  It’s worth the wait.  You can while away the time by having a Pinkie Pie (marachino cherry!  Champagne float!), a Twilight Sparkle (so purple!  Blackberries!)  or an Ember (all the blue!  Blueberries!)  After all that fruit, it’s basically salad, amirite?

    L-R: a Pinkie Pie, cheers to the GPT!, a beautifully delicious Ember

    L-R: a Pinkie Pie, cheers to the GPT!, a pitcher of Ember

  • Have a GPT.  Maybe have another.  Maybe double-check your panel list to make sure you’ll be sober enough to make whatever you’re  psyched for on Friday.

    We're not tipsy. YOU'RE TIPSY.

    We’re not tipsy. YOU’RE TIPSY.

  • Cheers it up with new friends, friends from last year’s Trot, and everypony else. Get your picture taken with Boneless.  As you do.
  • Notice that Bartender Steve has pony dub going on in the background, thanks to his access to Spotify, and willingness to let anyone choose the tunes.  [NOTE: if anypony does a BronyPalooza Spotify playlist before next year’s Trot, I’ll love you forever.] Sing along with everypony.
  • Notice the time.  Decide that it’s best to walk back home before leg wobble sets in.  Pony responsibly, my friends.
  • Walk by the Convention Center.  See all the Bronies.  Get all sorts of happyfeels.  IT IS ON MAH PONIES.

So to wrap: VIP is totally worth the price of admission, because getting your nosh on is always a good idea (plus the VIP shirt is schweeeeeet), wander around all the bars and say howdy, but remember to pay respect to Bartender Steve and all his lovely, delicious beverages.  Get back to your weekend digs to rest up before THE weekend.  Stay pony, my friends.

*Individual results may vary, depending on hours spent Trotting, and the personal constitution of the Brony.  Cheers!

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