Atomic Fangirl

“I should investigate. FAT CHANCE!”

Story: It’s finally summer break! A group of friends head out to a great house in the woods, owned by one of Our Gang’s friends. It’s got everything: lots of bedrooms, a great kitchen, a pond out back…and a killer prowling around. What’s that sound? *ribbit*

Scares: If you’re a lightweight, sure. This is mostly schlocky fun that winks at the audience.
Splat Factor:  Low budget “blood”, a decapitation in wide-shot, and some pretty cool flesh melting FX.

Subgenre: Troma-tastic Films
Year Released: 1991
Remake, Sequel or OG (Original Ghoul)?: Original. In fact, this is one of the first meta-horror comedies.

Trick or Treat?: Troma produced. Zero budget. Twenty year old Rolfe Kanefsky’s first film. If these things aren’t getting you salivating? Perhaps this one’s not for you. But for everybody else, it’s a sincere ode to horror tropes and clichés.

Story: Four stories that have one thing in common; items that were obtained in a curio shop. A mirror, a medal, a snuff box, a an elaborate door. Do the new owners have what it takes to survive once things start to go very wrong? We’ll see…

Scares: 70s creepy modern Gothic vibes.
Splat Factor:  Some blood, and a bit of the old ultra-violence.

Subgenre: Mid-20th Century Horror Anthologies
Year Released: 1974
Remake, Sequel or OG (Original Ghoul)?: Based on stories by award winning writer R. Chetwynd-Hayes.

Trick or Treat?: Finally getting around to the last of the Amicus anthologies. Not as good as the ones based on Robert Bloch stories or EC comics, but campy fun. Especially as the shop keeper is none other than the great Peter Cushing, giving it his all.

“What the fuck are you?”

Story: After the death of her emotionally manipulative and abusive husband, Harper rents a lovely home Herefordshire. She’s gone there to heal from her recent past, and to deal with her trauma, grief, and guilt. But she sees odd men everywhere. Odd men who all look the same. Is she an unreliable narrator? Or is this screenplay just a messy slog overstuffed with metaphor? Spoiler – it’s a bit of both.

Scares: Lots of dread and odd creepiness.
Splat Factor:  A bloody Sue-of-side, stab wounds, and a weird body horror climax.

Subgenre: Weird Patriarchal Horrors
Year Released: 2022
Remake, Sequel or OG (Original Ghoul)?: Original

Trick or Treat?: I’d been fascinated by the trailer for this film when it hit theaters. But I never seemed to get around to it. Now, after watching it? I can see I was simply trying to avoid a clunker. Oops.

“I intend to enjoy the time I have left, and I suggest you do the same. Life is precious. Enjoy every single second.”

Story: In 1969, young couple Iris and Paul attend the grand opening of Skybar, a Space Needle-esqe restaurant. Except Skybar is made from tissue paper and spit. So when Iris gets a premonition that everyone will die horribly? She prevents it. But as per usual, Death is pissed. But it takes decades to get the reckoning done, and now there are generations to obliterate…

Scares: Thrills and chills
Splat Factor:  OMG yes. This series is known for the gruesome stuff.

Subgenre: Worn-Out Franchise Additions
Year Released: 2025
Remake, Sequel or OG (Original Ghoul)?: Part of the Final Destination franchise. Hopefully the last one.


Trick or Treat?: I don’t know why I did this to myself. I absolutely hate Everyone Dies films. Okay fine; 5 was fun in an ironic, campy way. But Bloodlines takes itself way too seriously to be enjoyable, and with so many characters, it’s tough to give a damn who lives…or rather, when each one dies.