“I can live with that.”
‘We’ll see.’

Story: A group of eight vampires holds a meeting in a secluded farmhouse. But maybe not quite as secluded as they thought, as soldiers and a Vatican official are there to take down a vamp. Maybe they should have planned for more than one… Meanwhile, a human has been invited to the meeting, but what’s his deal? Fear, most likely.

Scares: Chuckles, not creeps.

Splat factor: Meh. Some blood, but deaths are either off-screen or in at least a medium shot.

Closing scene “shocker”?: Nope, though there’s a fun bit right before the end that pulls away from the basic story.

Remake, Sequel or OG (Original Ghoul)?: Original, save for some vampire myths.

Trick or Treat?: An action packed horror comedy that feels like a blend of What We Do in the Shadows, Ready or Not, and Dog Soldiers (but with less fur obviously.)

And GAAAAAAH – it’s Freema Agyeman, aka Martha from Doctor Who! I love her! Actually, there are several actors in Locals that I love watching. Daredevil‘s Charlie Cox, the Pirates franchise’s Mackenzie Crook, and Defiance‘s Tony Curran. Good actors equal good fun watching them dig into the genre, and that’s exactly the case here.

As for the vamps, they’re an interesting mix of time honored myth, Kindred: The Embrace’ed/Vampire: The Masquerade hierarchy, with a touch of 30 Days of Night in the teeth. They turn to dust at death, ala Buffy the Vampire Slayer, they’re cold and show up that way on heat vision, and have irises that glow reflectively like cats. The vampy FX is mostly minimalist, and that works for this action-y genre romp.

And there’s a heckuva lot of action here, with soldiers and vamps unloading like Arnold’s Commando on a bender. But there’s plenty of time for deadpan humor, and scrambled expectations. I just wish one particular death – one more chosen than meted out – was given a bit more exposition. Just an extra sentence or two, because I’d come to care about many of these characters.

But I’m not mad. I love a good “who are the real monsters” trope, especially when the answer seems to be both sides ain’t innocent. And the cast does a great job with the script as well as the hard core physical demands of the film. Heck, their “fight consultant” is JASON STATHAM y’all. Seriously.

Even the end credits music is kickass. How can I not enjoy the hell out of this movie? It’s good blam-blam-fangy fun.

Score: 4 out of 5 pumpkins.