Horror, Cult Movies, Exploitation Cinema, 70s Schlock, and more! Let’s look at something cool every Friday!

“Now. What are we gonna watch?”

Where I Watched: Shudder

Genre: Retro-esque Booby-Nekkids Horror

Pedigree: This one’s from Fangoria. It should have been more fun.

Synopsis: In a super thumpy small town, four teenage movie theater ushers (and one hardcore music loving projectionist) stumble on some old exploration films. But watching these movies gets the blood flowing off the screen and into the aisles…

Fabulous or Frustrating?: The “satanic film” that the hapless teen characters watch is the best part of this eager to please mess; a mix of art house and exploitation, from the flashing Suspiria colors to the blood, bewbs, and crazy non sequitur film montages. Pity the actual film is such a clunker.

Looks like the small town is supposed to be extremely backwards, as retro films like Encino Man and A League of Their Own are playing at the theater. Or the film could be set in the 90s, I dunno. There’s zero setup beyond the characters getting ready to close up the theater for the night.

The acting is…as good as you’d expect from a low budget horror joint. Which is to say fair to abysmal, depending on the scene. I can’t tell if this is due to the performers, or the lack of direction. But everyone seems bored, even when the ish hits the fan.

But there’s plenty for gorehounds to enjoy, with the succubus making all sorts of…parts…meet untimely ends. Plus, there’s lots of nudity, and even a few johnsons. Yeah, it’s that kind of horror movie. Typically, I’m down for a retro horror vibe, but this movie doesn’t really seem to know what the hell it’s doing, where it’s going, or why. Which is a shame, as the premise is a good one, and there are moments of fun (that are all too brief).

I’d say skip this one, or watch it as background noise while you’re doing something else. I love you, Fangoria. But this one you whiffed.

Freak-O-Meter: 1 out of 5 Freaks