“Don’t you want to be a good guy?”

Story: Jeff just can’t catch a break. He’s been floundering ever since his tour in the 82nd Airborne ended. His wife divorced him, gaining custody of their three young children. And money? Well, he gets that by robbing places. So naturally, he gets busted…only to break out. But where to hide out ’til things cool down? Why not be a Toys ‘R’ Us kid? Not like he’s gonna fall in love or anything.

Genre I’d put it in: Based On A True Story That Feels Like Straight To Streaming
Release Date: 2025
Remake, Sequel, Based-On, or Original:Based on the life of Jeffrey Manchester, called “Roofman” for his MO of breaking into places through the roof.

Gotta say: This shallow bait-and-switch of a movie puts highly likeable characters into a film that switches gears in the last act. Which is fine if there’s a solid foundation in the screenplay, but here? It feels like this wannabe Netflix meet-cute story record-scratches into a “well’p, guess I am actually the bad guy but now I’m wiser” ending. Spoiler? Kinda, if you don’t know about the man this is based on. But y’know what? I don’t care. Roofman is an enjoyable if tepid by the numbers romance that becomes absolutely insufferable at the end. I really hope this stellar cast got seriously paid for starring in this clunker.

This is a film that hopes you’ll bring your hard earned to the multiplex for some Channing Tatum hijinks. And fair; Tatum has shown to be an excellent comedic actor, and plays the lunk with a heart of gold exceedingly well. Here though, his Jeff – known to his new friends as John Zorn – has a heart of avarice and selfishness the plot tries to gloss over. This film tries desperately to get you to like Jeff/John, and for the majority of this film, it succeeds. That’s partly due to Tatum’s likeable charisma, and the screenplay’s soothingly familiar narrative.

In fact, the whole cast is outstanding, and helps to lift the tired tropes this film trots out. Of course Tatum is excellent, and so is Kirsten Dunst as “John’s” girlfriend Leigh. They give way too much to this story, but I’m glad they did; their immense talent was a balm to my soul as the film unspooled. Roofman also has big-hitters like LaKeith Stanfield, Uzo Aduba, Ben Mendelsohn, and Peter Dinklage as the requisite bad guy boss. Each one of these performers lights up the screen whenever they’re in a scene, and seeing some of these folks work together is genuinely wonderful. But then the screenplay continues to plod, even under their expert ministrations.

We know the drill when it comes to love stories. A bad guy becomes a good guy thanks to the love of a good woman, solid friendships, and/or adorable kids who show him that there’s more to this ol’ world than money. The trailers for Roofman all but scream feel-good flick at the top of their lungs. So when the climax hits and Jeff ends up “cleaning up” after his time with Leigh and her family by blowing up a dentist’s office and knocking a Cash-In-Transit guard unconscious at the Toys ‘R’ Us? It’s uncomfortably jarring. What had been a lighthearted love story/comedic romp suddenly turns into a pseudo-thriller.

What could have worked well in the hands of more competent folks behind the camera turns into a film that has no real audience. Romance fans won’t enjoy the way things end, heist fans won’t enjoy the bland love story, and true crime fans will pick apart the inconsistencies as they wait for something interesting to happen. It’s a hat-trick of disappointment that feels like it was made for streaming, but caught a wide release based on the power of it’s cast. It shouldn’t have been so lucky.

#Protip: Toys ‘R’ Us is coming back, baybeeeee! But maybe don’t use it as temporary housing. Or at least bring your own snacks.