Story: Kane Hodder lives in the woods with his horribly disfigured son.  Son gets even more disfigured in a fire, goes crazy and kills Robert Englund and a bunch of stupid tourists, while Tony Todd stays safely in town.

Scares: Though there’s lots of humor here, there are a few scares too.

Splat factor: C’mon – the movie is called Hatchet; this ain’t no disco.  Almost silly and over-the-top, gore-wise, but considering they market this as a horror-comedy, that’s to be expected.  From the opening scene you’ve got dismemberment, body organs & blood. Things pick up from there. Enjoy!

Closing scene “shocker”?: Sigh.  Yeah.  There’s a sequel — the creatively titled Hatchet II — with two more sequels in the works.

Remake, Sequel or OG (Original Ghoul)?:  This is an original.

Trick or Treat?: A bag of mini-pretzels; I should have really liked it, but I wanted something a little bit different.  Probably because like Undead or Alive, this movie keeps the fact that it’s part comedy on the DL.  It has a promising start though.  In fact, it has a pretty good beginning, middle…but the end is the same-old, same-old.  I understand the quest for cashola, but seeing the same ending over and over starts to dull the senses.  But on the plus side, several horror icons get to have a good time in cameo spots, the cute geeky scientist from Avatar (and Bones) is the lead, and fellas, you get to see Harmony from Buffy the Vampire Slayer flash her boobies.  All the actors seem like they’re having a good time. There’s no ac-tor moments, but if you’re looking for serious acting in a movie called Hatchet, I have a bridge to sell you. Perfect for a gore lover that can’t handle the stress of suspense. Or anyone who wants to see a horror movie, but can’t take a full tilt scarefest.

Score:    out of 5 pumpkins. Can’t say I hated it, can’t say I liked it enough for a full pumpkin bump-up.