“Timmy’s not taking any visitors. He needs time to…adjust.”

Story: It’s 1969 y’all – Summer of Love! But in Ludlow, Maine, an old darkness rises when Bill Bateman’s son Timmy comes back in a box. But thanks to that old pet cemetery, Timmy won’t be in a box for much longer. Groovy?

Scares: Lots of creepy creepiness.
Splat Factor: Resurrected dead, soon to be and recently dead, and ripped up animals that fit into the above three categories.

Subgenre: Sometimes Dead Is Better Stories
Year Released: 2023
Remake, Sequel or OG (Original Ghoul)?: This is the prologue installment of the Pet Sematary franchise.

Trick or Treat?: Bloodlines isn’t bad, and even has a few moments that really work. The under 90 minutes runtime keeps things paced well, with no draggy moments. Plus, it’s got Pam Grier as a badass mailcarrier. What’s not to love? Well, my cold heart found a couple things that I’ll get to in a tic, but all in all? This is a fun one to watch when the lights are low, with a little nip in the air and a wind that seems to whisper from outside your warm, snug home.

It’s nice to see a subplot focusing on the Micmac tribe, and how that cemetery was built as an area of protection, until it became spiritually polluted. Yes, it might be lip service for representation, but the portrayal of Native Americans as regular folks rather than just ooky spooky “others”? It’s a nice thing to have nonetheless. Plus, Forrest Goodluck as Manny, and Isabella Star LaBlanc as his sister Donna are just great characters to root for. And they have a kickass VW Bug, so? Bonus.

As for the so-so? The new-to-this-film “aim for the eyes” bit isn’t particularly in keeping with the original story, as Gage was poisoned. But fine, now I want a Sematary crossover with Romero’s breed of zombos. Go crazy or go home y’all. Meanwhile in this film? The creators seem to equate deaths and gore with spooky. And sure, that can happen, but even though the FX are great, a lot of kills feel like padding the count for gorehound cred. And this gorehound would have rather had more spooky and less blood.

I know, I’m as shocked as you are that I just typed that last bit. But maybe it’s because with Bloodlines, I gave a damn about the main characters, and wanted to see them all make it to the end credits. Even though we all know that the “Sematary” is still going strong long after this tale draws to a close. Yeah, I have a heart. Sometimes. Don’t tell anybody.

So yeah, the story is a lot like supernatural big bad throw downs we’ve seen before, and “sometimes dead is better” is used one too many times. But with a talented cast and a story that tugged at my heart while creeping me out? I’d watch this again. It’s a nice not so guilty pleasure for when I want to settle in for something quick and creepy.

Score: 3.5 out of 5 pumpkins.