“What did they teach you about revenge in your course…?”

Story: Paul Dood wants nothing more than to be famous. So when there’s a television talent competition audition nearby, he drops everything to attend. And everything happens to get in the way of his big chance. So? Payback’s a bitch…and so are astoundingly stupid coincidences.

Scares: Absolutely zero.
Splat Factor: Some, but with this sloppy-ass story? Who cares.

Subgenre: I don’t think it knows what it is. So I won’t presume.
Year Released: 2023 (Shudder US) 2021 (UK)
Remake, Sequel or OG (Original Ghoul)?: Original.


Trick or Treat?: First things first; I watched Break on Shudder, so I expected a bloody good time. Instead, this film is a mashup of black comedy, revenge flicks, and absurdity that doesn’t seem to know what it’s actually going for. Did I enjoy it? Not bloody likely.

Paul’s situations are too heartbreaking and/or frustrating to be funny, and I love me some British humor. Perhaps because the title character feels like he’s on the spectrum, so any laughs that might be teased, just dried up in my throat. But he’s too unlikable for empathy, so I’m not sure what director Nick Gillespie was going for here. Unlikeable main characters, I can get with. Unreliable narrators, I can get with. But Paul is just a shambles of tics, abrasive qualities, and confusion. I had an extremely hard time giving one single shit about his day. Felt bad for his mum though. 

Not sure if Break is supposed to be a comedy, a horror, or satire. But whatever it is? It doesn’t work. The messy, incoherent plot does this film no favors, nor do the lackluster performances. For which I blame the director’s lack of focus, rather than the performers lack of talent. It’s hard to deliver the goods when you’re given nothing but mush to work with. Okay, fine. The climax was fun, but even though I enjoyed the strange confetti nonsense of it all? It was too little, too late, and I can’t stop thinking about every other second of this movie, and how it disappointed the hell outta me.

I’d like to think the whole problem is that this film was on Shudder, when it’s not a horror movie at all. Well, it’s about as horror as Hot Fuzz. But y’know what? Fuzz is an absolute blast, and Break is just an hour and thirty-five minutes I’ll never get back. I’ll not give it another second of my time. Sticking a fork in Break, and this review.

Score: 1 out of 5 pumpkins. Giving this a pumpkin because it’s always lovely to watch Kris Marshall dialing it up to full pretentious asshole. That slice of ham deserves a pumpkin.