“Suffering is love.”

Story: Cecilia is a novitiate from Michigan coming to Italy to take her final vows, and devote her life to serve elderly and terminal nuns “before their transition to heaven.” But as she adjusts to life as a nun, she quickly realizes that it’s not the life of service she thought she’d signed up for. It’s a whole lot worse.

Scares: Suspense, not scares
Splat Factor: Gloriously gory moments, though this one’s not a bloodbath

Subgenre: 21st Century Nunsploitation
Year Released: 2024
Remake, Sequel or OG (Original Ghoul)?: Original

Trick or Treat?: Immaculate got dumped into the early March dump for feature films, and that’s a shame. While this would never be a blockbuster, it’s a damn fine bit of horror that’s a fun mix of 70s Nunsploitation and modern-day art house horror. The title hints at what’s in store, but the third act of this devilish horror has a few twists up it’s habit.

There are plenty of homages to other films that hew to this type of story; Rosemary’s Baby, The Omen series, and Susperia, to name a few. What I liked best about Immaculate is the way it knows what viewers are expecting, and absolutely messes with your ideas. I truly had “it’s pretty clear WTF is going on here” written in my notes while I was watching, only to prove myself wrong. A film that can bypass my way too vast knowledge of horror tropes? I tip my wimple to you, Writer Andrew Lobel and director Michael Mohan. The way this story is slowly unveiled both to American viewers and Cecilia by way of our heroine’s language barrier – her Italian is così così – helps build suspense and tension.

Once all is revealed, Mohan’s gorgeous use of angles and color feels like mid-20th Century giallo films as well as modern-day films from folks like Ari Aster, Jordan Peele, and Robert Eggers. There are gorgeous shots of blood amonst the nuns’ severe black and white aesthetic. Candlelight throws white into off-white, hinting at the way things aren’t exactly pure over at Our Lady of Sorrows. My quibble here is the ol’ “bad guys chasing you can’t see your lighted candle/flashlight in the dark”. I was pulled out of the story a couple of times, screaming at silly Cecilia to dim the damn lights already.

Speaking of our girl, Sidney Sweeney gives terrific terrified. Her big blue eyes are able to show horror, terror, disgust, and innocence. It’s a masterful performance, and one that holds together the fair to middling premise of the film. I also loved Benedetta Porcaroli as Sister Gwen, the requisite smart-ass convent gal who knows something is up.

The first act is a promising intro that lays out all sorts of possibilities. The second is a slow-paced horror mystery ala The Omen that has a few chilling moments but otherwise is così così. But that third act, y’all. That’s where the fun really is. And DAT ENDING. Sure, Cecilia may have a few scenes where she loses her lunch (and boy I hate seeing that on film), but the ending is one where you’ll definitely want to put down the popcorn ’til those credits roll. I was slack-jawed; they went there? Yes, yes they did. And if anything in this review ticked a box for you? You should go there too. Y’know, to this film. Not to the actual ending. Breathe, y’all. Breathe.

P.S.: as this film takes place in a convent where the sisters do every task? There are chickens we see meeting their ends by axe. FYI for my fellow animal friends.

Score: 3 out of 5 pumpkins.