“That wasn’t real that wasn’t real I hate this.” [me every time I play a horror game]

Story: Poor Bryan has been having a bad day. His courier job leaves him wandering halls, his girlfriend Michelle is pregnant and his response to that has them seemingly at odds, and his “easy” add-on assignment has him out in the middle of snowy nowhere. Why? Because a woman ran out in front of his car…and then got back up. I’m sure that’s fine though. He’ll get to the hospital, drop off the cooler, and get back home to Michelle, no problem. Right? Sure.

Genre I’d put it in: Damn That’s Good Interpretations
Release Date: 2026
Remake, Sequel, Based-On, or Original: Based on the games, books, and basically everything else in the Resident Evil franchise.
Animals okay?: There’s a good doggy protecting a farm…OH MY GOD BAD DOGGY
Special Shout-out: Sara Paxton, as Billy’s girlfriend Michelle. She’s just a voice on the phone, but her frustration turning into worry, then dread, is really well done. I hope she gets lots more voice work from this.

Gotta say: Before I really get to it, there’s something you need to know; I’m not a video game person. Because I suck at them. I’ll watch someone else play, but me? I’ll be walking at a wall for hours, or ending myself immediately because I have absolutely no idea what I’m doing. That said, I’ve enjoyed the Mila Jovovich Resident Evil films for the hilariously fun bullshit they are, and I even found the Evil TV show fun. So basically, I’ve got zero loyalty to the games, because I have zero knowledge of them. That said, even I can see that this Evil right here is an amazingly detailed, fun film that feels like you’re doing a walkthrough of a game set in the Racoon City universe. And it’s a blast.

The setting echoes game film/shows like Five Nights at Freddy’s and Fallout. Characters that aren’t in the games are thrust into this world, and hilarity ensues. Director Zach Cregger also shares writing duties with Shay Hatten – who brings his action bona-fides from the John Wick franchise – and gives us as realistic as a zombie story can be. Characters act like real people would, FUBARs, second guesses and all. Bryan a good guy even though he’s an idiot. I say that with love, because he’s our Everyman here, doing his best, and sometimes failing.

As Bryan, Austin Abrams is crazy good as a man going through the craziest things you could never imagine. His stunt work is understandably messy, and his choices echo those anyone else in his shoes would do. Plus, he does what I’d do; he talks to himself throughout the film, partially to bolster himself, partially to release tension. And that dialogue is priceless (see above.) Let’s face it; Evil works like one of those first-person games, where the lead is the only person onscreen for the vast majority of time. I mean, outside of the monsters and such. So while there are other performers that quickly come and go? Abrams is basically it. Though I do have to mention the wonderful Zach Cherry, whom I’ve enjoyed watching ever since I got sucked in to Severance.

Cinematography by Dariusz Wolski is visually stunning, with scenes shifting color from “real life” to bright orange floodlights, to the cold blue of sewers, and then the blinding white of a lab in lockdown. And while I mentioned Abrams’ stunt work, the shift from actor to stunt person is seamless, thanks to an incredible stunt ensemble. But you’re here for the blood and guts, amirite? Yeah baby. And it’s everywhere. Bodies literally explode, intestines are splayed, characters are eaten by huge torso-mouths, and the mutations here are like nothing I saw in the Mila-verse. It’s an interesting take on the mutation – a crazy mix of The Thing, The Faculty, and The Last of Us‘ Rat King, and it’s gloriously disgusting. One scene makes the mutation look like weird earthworms, and the way they slither is shudder-inducing. Cregger put a focus on practical effects, using CGI sparingly to flesh out (ahem) the images.

Weird, creepy, gross, kinda hilarious, and honestly touching? That’s a whole lot to cram into about an hour and a half. But this Resident Evil does it without breaking a sweat. The door’s open for a sequel – because this is a film based on a game, duh – but either way? It’s so lovely to see a game adaptation done not just right, but beautifully.

#Protip: FX master Shane Mahan crafted a two-ton puppet for the film. And it’s awesome.