Atomic Fangirl

“…so you better fasten your seatbelts, ’cause it’s time for takeoff! WOO!”

Story: A group of local government employees have finally gotten their project off the ground; the Kolarengen Shopping Center, which will breathe life into that communities’ infrastructure. Probably. But when the group celebrate – er, have “professional development training”, so it can be written off as a business expense – at Kolarsjön Holiday Village, things start to go wrong. Then things start to go weird. And I’m not just talking about their creepy mascot. But that’s part of it. Dammit, where’d everybody go?

Scares: Nah. Unless you’re a soft touch in regards to effective FX.
Splat Factor: The kills are effective, so the blood is loud and proud.

Subgenre: Coworkers In The Woods Slasher
Year Released: 2023
Remake, Sequel or OG (Original Ghoul)?: Based on the novel of the same name by Mats Strandberg.

Trick or Treat?: Not to be confused with The Conference 2022, this Conference is a coworkers having a “team building exercise” in the woods, as opposed to Nazis in WWII trying to figure out the “final solution”. And honestly? ’22’s film is probably a whole lot scarier. As it stands, Conference is…fine. It’s fine. Mediocre and unremarkable, but otherwise fine.

“OMG mom, you need to stop, okay? This has nothing to do with me. You know, I kinda sorta wish you guys would get over it.”

Story: In 1987, three girls were murdered by the “Sweet Sixteen Killer” – and in present day, high school junior Jamie Hughes is over it already. But then the killer reappears, and murders another of the ol’ class of ’87. When the killer tries to murder Jamie at the school’s science fair? She hides in her friend’s time machine…which picks this time to work. So, what up, 1987?

Scares: Surprisingly effective suspense for a horror comedy that’s heavy on the comedy.
Splat Factor: The killer stabs his victims 16 times. So there’s that.

Subgenre: Cozy Retro Horror Comedies
Year Released: 2023
Remake, Sequel or OG (Original Ghoul)?: Original, but there are lots of recognizable tropes you’ll enjoy.

Trick or Treat?: I’m a sucker for 80s throwback horror movies. I mean, that’s when I graduated high school, graduated college, got to see all those great classic slashers in theaters…so when Killer doled out it’s teaser awhile back? I was hoping for a good time. I was not disappointed. This new Blumhouse joint is a mashup of Back to the Future, Hot Tub Time Machine, and 80s slashers like Prom Night and Cutting Class. Nahnatchka Khan brings her comedy chops from projects like Fresh Off the Boat and Don’t Trust the B— in Apartment 23, blending it with an 80s aesthetic and just enough blood to keep things, well, slashy. Plus, this film stars one of my favorite young performers, Kiernan Shipka, as Final Girl/Fix-It Girl Jamie. Did y’all mean to make something that included almost everything I adore? Because you did, movie. YOU DID.

“Guys, you don’t know what can happen here.”

Story: Ruthie has lost her grandmother, but gained an old hotel. So she brings her girlfriend, a friend, and an acquaintance to the place before she decides to sell. As the emotions of the quartet get heated in isolation, strange things start to happen. Is the hotel fucking with them, or has Ruthie gone full Torrance?

Scares: There’s a chainsaw so you’d think… But there’s a light touch with onscreen red stuff.
Splat Factor: Lots of tension between the characters that turns into psychological terror.

Subgenre: Haunted Hotels…And People
Year Released: 2023
Remake, Sequel or OG (Original Ghoul)?: Original, but harks back to films like The Shining, The Innkeepers, and other such chillers.

Trick or Treat?: Things is a psychological study within a haunted hotel… Kinda like The Shining for a GenZ world. With a touch of *that* dream. You know, the one where you’re the only one in a huge mall or something? Yeah, that creepy one. It’s a fascinating setup that had me all-in from the start. Like the similarly set – and paced – The Inkeepers, Things focuses on the characters and their emotional connections… and disconnections.