Baltimore Screening Pass-palooza – “Saturday Night”!

SNL hit it’s 50th season two days ago, so why not hark back to it’s first episode? Synopsis!

At 11:30pm on October 11, 1975, a ferocious troupe of young comedians and writers changed television – and culture – forever. Directed by Jason Reitman and written by Gil Kenan & Reitman, Saturday Night is based on the true story of what happened behind the scenes in the 90 minutes leading up to the first broadcast of Saturday Night Live. Full of humor, chaos, and the magic of a revolution that almost wasn’t, we count down the minutes in real time until we hear those famous words…

Ready? Let’s go!

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“Megalopolis” is mega-baffling

“When does an empire die?”

Story: Your guess is as good as mine. Maybe better. Probably better. Something something Rome, something something America, something something LSD trip.

Genre I’d put it in:
Release Date: 2024
Remake, Sequel, Based-On, or Original: From Coppola’s brainpan

Gotta say: Francis Ford Coppola had the idea of this film since at least the 80s. He’d worked on it for decades. And Megalopolis is the textbook example of a creator being too close to their creation, and not seeing it with a critical eye. Don’t worry though, that’s what I’m here for. Because Megalopolis, to crib from Shakespeare – hey, this film repeatedly does – is full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.

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In Queue Review – “Uglies”

“I don’t wanna be free, I wanna be Pretty!”

Genre: YA Utopia As Dystopia
Release Date: 2024
Where I Watched: Netflix

Gist: In the probably distant future, children are raised away from their parents while they wait for their 16th birthday. At that milestone, they become “Pretty”, by having a absolute boatload of plastic surgery. Y’know, because if you’re pretty, you don’t have a single problem in the world? Yeah. Obviously, there’s a counter-culture on the down-low, hiding from this city’s influence. What will 15 year-old Tally choose for herself? Um, you know how this works, y’all.

Gotta say: Based on the series of novels by Scott Westerfeld, Uglies is your typical futuristic YA science fiction joint. It’s not bad, it’s not good, it’s just empty. Think the hollowness of Divergent with the possibilities of Maze Runner, but with characters so run of the mill it’s hard to care what happens to them, and a world that sounds intriguing, but is dumbed down by Pretty Is Good. (There are big ol’ hints at a more nefarious reason why the Pretties are created, but that tasty tidbit is pushed aside so hard I felt it slam into next week.)

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Baltimore Screening Pass-palooza – “Megalopolis”!

Ready for awards season? Let’s get started with some Coppola! Synopsis!

MEGALOPOLIS is a Roman Epic set in an imagined Modern America. The City of New Rome must change, causing conflict between Cesar Catilina (Adam Driver), a genius artist who seeks to leap into a utopian, idealistic future, and his opposition, Mayor Franklyn Cicero (Giancarlo Esposito), who remains committed to a regressive status quo, perpetuating greed, special interests, and partisan warfare. Torn between them is socialite Julia Cicero (Nathalie Emmanuel), the mayor’s daughter, whose love for Cesar has divided her loyalties, forcing her to discover what she truly believes humanity deserves.

Ready? Let’s go!

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Where’s the Body? – first clip from Max’s Salem’s Lot!

It’s an unlisted video, so I’m guessing it hasn’t been widely shown… Yet. But it looks absolutely incredible. Synopsis, for the three people who don’t know what’s up (I love you three):

Ben Mears is a writer who returns to his childhood home of Jerusalem’s Lot in search of inspiration, only to discover his hometown is being preyed upon by a vampire, leading him to band together with a ragtag group to fight it.

I’m ridiculously stoked to see this adaptation, as I’ve loved the book for decades. The cast looks good, and the creepy factor is delightful.

Salem’s Lot is scheduled to hit Max in October of this year.

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“Beetlejuice Beetlejuice” might try to do too much, but it’s still fun fun

“Come in…if you dare.”

Story: It’s been 36 years after Lydia Deetz managed to avoid marrying The Ghost With The Most, and while some things have changed, others haven’t. Delia, Lydia, and Lydia’s daughter Astrid, go back to the old homestead after patriarch Charles’s death, and that miniature town is still in the attic. I’m sure that no matter how crazy things seem, nobody’s actually gonna fall for the whole three-times thing again. Right? Sure.

Genre I’d put it in: Busy But Appealing Sequels
Release Date: 2024
Remake, Sequel, Based-On, or Original: Sequel to 1988’s Beetlejuice.

Gotta say: Sequels decades after the OG can be considered disappointing (see: Zoolander 2, TRON Legacy) or flat-out amazing (see: Mad Max: Fury Road, Top Gun: Maverick). BB floats somewhere in-between. There’s a whole lot to love in this lovingly devoted sequel, but there’s also a lot, period.

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Baltimore Screening Pass-palooza – “Transformers One”!

Ready for a story about how the Transformers truly began? Synopsis!

TRANSFORMERS ONE is the untold origin story of Optimus Prime and Megatron, better known as sworn enemies, but once were friends bonded like brothers who changed the fate of Cybertron forever. In the first-ever fully CG-animated Transformers movie, TRANSFORMERS ONE features a star-studded voice cast, including Chris Hemsworth, Brian Tyree Henry, Scarlett Johansson, Keegan-Michael Key, Steve Buscemi, with Laurence Fishburne, and Jon Hamm.

Ready? Let’s go!

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“Alien: Romulus” – a beautiful yet baffling bit of fan service

With fewer and fewer films being screened for press in the Baltimore area, I’ll be doing more opening day/week reviews. Apologies for folks who’ve been asking for them earlier – and if there’s anything you’d like me to look at, old or new? Hit me up!

“Take a good look out the window. ‘Cause the way I see it we ain’t never coming back.” [Oh, Pumpkin. Truer words…]

Story: When last we met the Weyland-Yutani Corporation… Oh wait. This takes place immediately after Alien. So don’t tell this new group of characters – who want to leave a hideous mining planet for literal greener pastures – what awaits them when they try to grab space supplies from an “abandoned” WY space probe. You’ll ruin their surprise.

Genre I’d put it in: Sequel/Prequel (Presequel?) That Blows It In Act 3
Release Date: 2024
Remake, Sequel, Based-On, or Original: Part of the Alien franchise. Set immediately after the events of 1979’s Alien.

Gotta say: I tried my best to stay away from the trailers for Romulus, only to have the movie poster ruin the first death. This is a hint of what’s to come in this film. Romulus does a good job with setting up a new story, only to whiff it. But I’m getting ahead of myself. I really wanted to love Romulus, and for the first hour and change, I really did. Then the story, and the characters, started to try too hard to be something else. Something we’ve seen before. Oh, bummer.

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“Kneecap” – a heartfelt, hedonistic look at a rap subgenre worth plugging into


“Across the globe, an indigenous language dies every 40 days.”

Story: Three lads in West Belfast decide to come together and make music. What could be the problem? Well, they plan on rapping in Irish Language (aka Gaelic, for folks here in the States), and in the 2010’s? Irish as a language wasn’t fully recognized by Ireland’s British overlords. Oh, and the lads are heavy into musical language that’d make their USA counterparts get stuck with an Explicit Lyrics sticker. But live venues hold the key to their music, and perhaps even a rebirth of their beloved language.

Genre I’d put it in: Rockin’, Rappin’, Renegade Biopics
Release Date: 2024
Remake, Sequel, Based-On, or Original: Based on the band of the same name

Gotta say: Irish rappers that focus on their language, and their lives? I saw the teaser for Kneecap awhile back, and I made a note to check this one out. So when a screener hit my inbox, I grabbed it with both hands. And it’s a damn fun time. Just like the band itself, Kneecap the movie serves up lessons you’ll want to learn.

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In Queue Review – “Moviepass, MovieCrash”


If, like me, you’re avoiding the summer heat and humidity by catching up with films released earlier this year? I’m here to separate the worthy from the time-sucks.

“At one time, there was this really positive group of people who were just trying to make moviegoing easier. And [what happened to Moviepass after Lowe and Farnsworth took over is] really an example of, Iike, corporate greed, and what that can do to people, and to a company.”

Genre: Documentaries That Suck You IN
Release Date: 2024
Where I Watched: HBO Films/MAX

Gist: Remember MoviePass? That app in the ’10s that’d let you see “any movie, any time” for less than ten bucks a month? And how that company crashed hard, like we all expected it would? Turns out there’s a whole lot more to this story than it’s too-good-to-be-true facade…

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