I’m not big into the sportsballing. I’m not a sneaker head (though I do love those sneaks with the air pockets. So cool!) But Air has me chomping at the bit. Why? There seems to be a real story here. Synopsis!
From award-winning director Ben Affleck, AIR reveals the unbelievable game-changing partnership between a then-rookie Michael Jordan and Nike’s fledgling basketball division which revolutionized the world of sports and contemporary culture with the Air Jordan brand. This moving story follows the career-defining gamble of an unconventional team with everything on the line, the uncompromising vision of a mother who knows the worth of her son’s immense talent, and the basketball phenom who would become the greatest of all time.
And c’mon, we get to see Affleck and Damon on screen together, along with Viola Davis, Jason Bateman, and Chris Tucker. Sounds like a fun time. Air hits theaters April 5, 2023.
Subgenre: Shape-shifting Shenanigans Release Date: 2023 FX: Not much, but in this low budget joint that’s actually a good thing Some Clichés/Tropes: What’s In Those Woods Anyway, Backwoods People Are Creepy By Law, Who’s There I Mean It, Surprise Motherfuckers Where I Watched: Screener (but available on Amazon Prime and Tubi)
Story: A foursome of twenty-somethings gear up for a house in the woods vacay. A couple, and two friends the couple want to match up. And hey, the house they’re going to is the same one where murders happened in the prologue! Who’da thunk? What could go wrong? Hey, what’s that noise?
Spooky or Nah?: if you looked at the movie poster and saw that it was just an image without actual film details and thought, this is probably a low budget horror movie? Then congratulations darling, you win. (What, I don’t know. But you win it.) This is a joint from DBS Films, who gave us The Haunting of the Murder House last year. Does it stack up? Well…
Super Heroes Scott Lang (Paul Rudd) and Hope Van Dyne (Evangeline Lilly) return to continue their adventures as Ant-Man and The Wasp. Together, with Hope’s parents Janet Van Dyne (Michelle Pfeiffer) and Hank Pym (Michael Douglas), and Scott’s daughter Cassie Lang (Kathryn Newton), the family finds themselves exploring the Quantum Realm, interacting with strange new creatures and embarking on an adventure that will push them beyond the limits of what they thought possible.
“You’re my friend, Wen. No matter what happens, I want you to remember that.”
Story: Eric and Andrew take their young daughter Wen to a vacation getaway in the woods. Cute cabin, gorgeous views, and lots of grasshoppers for Wen to catch and record (STEAM girl alert!) But when a stranger approaches Wen with a request, things soon become less than relaxing. In fact, when Leonard’s “co-workers” show up, things get downright creepy.
Genre I’d put it in: Tweaked Adaptations That Work Release Date: 2023 Remake, Sequel, Based-On, or Original: Based on the award winning book “The Cabin at the End of the World”, by Paul G. Tremblay
“So apparently there are two types of people in this world. The ones who wave at boats, and the ones who hate joy.”
Story: South London recently re-singled twenty-somethings Yas and Dom meet in a unisex bathroom, as you do. Over the course of a few days, they Do Adventures, Make Connections, and try to figure out where to go from here. (Hint: karaoke makes everything better y’all.)
Genre I’d put it in: Romcoms For Everyone – YES EVERYONE Release Date: 2023 (March 2023 to be specific, on Star & Hulu) Remake, Sequel, Based-On, or Original: Original!
Gotta say:Lane is perfectly messy, hilarious film that feels like Before Sunset through the lens of Wes Anderson on a bender. It’s a great lazy day, “dunno what genre I want” kinda film. Or just one that you can gather a bunch of friends together to check out, so you can all shout about who’s what character on screen. (Me? I’m definitely a Yas. What up, boats?)
Okay y’all, it’s time to get into the Superb Owl funtimes! Synopsis!
80 FOR BRADY is inspired by the true story of four best friends living life to the fullest when they take a wild trip to the 2017 Super Bowl LI to see their hero Tom Brady play. Starring Academy Award® nominee Lily Tomlin, Academy Award® winner Jane Fonda, Academy Award® winner Rita Moreno and Academy Award® winner Sally Field, with 7-time Super Bowl Champion and producer Tom Brady, 80 FOR BRADY is in-theatres February 3, 2023.
Fantastic book – will the film be as good? Only one way to find out; let’s check it out! Synopsis!
While vacationing at a remote cabin, a young girl and her parents are taken hostage by four armed strangers who demand that the family make an unthinkable choice to avert the apocalypse. With limited access to the outside world, the family must decide what they believe before all is lost.
Story: London, 1953. Mr. Williams is the head of the Public Works Department in London. He’s spent his entire life plodding along, raising his son alone, going from day to day with little to no joie de vivre. But when he’s diagnosed with a cancer that threatens to end his life in less than six months, he tries to figure out how to make the best of what little life, and living, he has left.
Genre I’d put it in: Remakes Worth Watching Release Date: 2022 (limited) – wide release 2023 Remake, Sequel, Based-On, or Original: Based on the classic film Ikiru (“To Live”) by the one and only Akira Kurusowa, which itself is based on the classic story “The Death of Ivan Ilyich” by Leo Tolstoy.
Gotta say: Yeah, this is another one of those “we rEleAseD it last year (in like seven theaters) for 2022 award traction but you couldn’t really see it ’til now” kinda joints. But I’m counting it as a 2023 movie, because I didn’t get to Sundance last year – or this year ONE DAY Y’ALL – and as far as I’m concerned? Wide release = year of release. That’s my hill that I’m dying on. Anyway, I didn’t even know this film existed ’til this month (January, 2023 for anyone reading this in the futurefuturefuture) and my first thought was not a positive one. Okay, kind of positive, because Bill Nighy OWNS. But after I realized that this is a remake/adaptation of Akira Kurosawa’s Ikiru? I got that feeling in the pit of my stomach. Y’know, the feeling you get when a TV show decides to add a quirky toddler to the cast to “freshen things up”. Yeah, I wasn’t hopeful. But after watching Living? I’m all in.
So, as Jason fortold, yea so the horror movie franchises will hark to NYC after the killer has exhausted their hometown. And lo, it has begun. Synopsis!
Following the latest Ghostface killings, the four survivors leave Woodsboro behind and start a fresh chapter. In Scream VI, Melissa Barrera (“Sam Carpenter”), Jasmin Savoy Brown (“Mindy Meeks-Martin”), Mason Gooding (“Chad Meeks-Martin”), Jenna Ortega (“Tara Carpenter”), Hayden Panettiere (“Kirby Reed”), and Courtney Cox (“Gale Weathers”) return to their roles in the franchise alongside Jack Champion, Henry Czerny, Liana Liberato, Dermot Mulroney, Devyn Nekoda, Tony Revolori, Josh Segarra and Samara Weaving.
Looks pretty good though – and it seems that this Ghostface want to stand above the crowd. Or rather, kill people in the middle of one.
“Did I watch you cut a guy with a decorative serving platter?”
There are movie trailers that get me hyped. There are movie trailers that make me think “nah, pass.” But Renfield makes me genuinely angry that I can’t watch the full movie immediately. Synopsis!
In this modern monster tale of Dracula’s loyal servant, Nicholas Hoult (Mad Max: Fury Road, X-Men franchise) stars as Renfield, the tortured aide to history’s most narcissistic boss, Dracula (Oscar® winner Nicolas Cage). Renfield is forced to procure his master’s prey and do his every bidding, no matter how debased. But now, after centuries of servitude, Renfield is ready to see if there’s a life outside the shadow of The Prince of Darkness. If only he can figure out how to end his codependency.
Holt plays up a hilarious Everyman-meets-superhero persona, and Cage is absolutely unhinged. Throw in Awkwafina as a deadpan audience proxy, and what must be the most cathartic group therapy meeting ever? Now this is how you re-introduce your monsters, Universal. I WANT MORE. Right now.