Happy October y’all! Synopsis!
From 20th Century Studios, New Regency, and acclaimed filmmaker David O. Russell comes “Amsterdam,” an original crime epic about three close friends who find themselves at the center of one of the most shocking secret plots in American history.
Ready? Let’s go!
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[I’m not even gonna put a quote in the quote part. Not one line in this film is worth it.]
Genre: Strange Homages To Classic TV
Release Date: 2022
Where I Watched: Netflix
Gist: Oh c’mon. You wouldn’t be reading this review if you didn’t know the Munsters. But you know the already settled family at 1313 Mockingbird Lane. How’d they get there? This film’ll show you.
Talky talk: I was stoked when I heard Rob Zombie was going to do a spin on The Munsters. But now I’m just disappointed. I appreciate his attempt, and it’s obvious by his attention to detail that he’s a huge fan of the original series, but this Munsters is weird in a bad way. Scenes feel stretched out for no reason except to pad the run time. Dialogue is clunky, and while the actors try their best, jokes don’t land, and are drawn out until any bit of humor is beaten out of them. (See: previous sentence.)
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“Hey. What’s up.”
Story: Bobby is a guy who’s big dream is getting NYC’s LGBTQ+ Museum off the ground, but his personal life is a train wreck. Aaron is a guy who’s lawyering his way through life, but his personal life is a train wreck. Can these two extremely commitment-phobic fellas figure out that they’re made for each other? (It’s a rom-com, hon. Guess.)
Genre I’d put it in: Opposites Attract But This Time GAAAAAY
Release Date: 2022
Remake, Sequel, Based-On, or Original: Harks back to rom-coms of the 90s and early aughts, but is a fresh take on tropes in this well-worn genre.
Gotta say: I am pre-disposed to absolutely love rom-coms. It’s something to do with the happily-ever-after (HEA) I think. Something that rarely seems to happen in real life, but always does in this genre. So, naturally, I enjoyed the ever-lovin’ hell outta Bros. From its in-your-face self aware cheekiness to the actual “shut up, you’re crying” moments, to the inevitable (and super adorable) HEA, Bros is a film that earns a place in this genre. Even though it’s always slyly letting you know that they’re in on the fun, and hey isn’t this a blast? Yes, Bros. Yes it is.
Continue readingReady for some laughs? ME TOO. Synopsis!
This fall, Universal Pictures proudly presents the first romantic comedy from a major studio about two gay men maybe, possibly, probably, stumbling towards love. Maybe. They’re both very busy.
From the ferocious comic mind of Billy Eichner (Billy on the Street, 2019’s The Lion King, Difficult People, Impeachment: American Crime Story) and the hitmaking brilliance of filmmakers Nicholas Stoller (the Neighbors films, Forgetting Sarah Marshall) and Judd Apatow (The King of Staten Island, Trainwreck, The Big Sick), comes Bros, a smart, swoony and heartfelt comedy about how hard it is to find another tolerable human being to go through life with.
Ready? Let’s go!
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“See you guys at six.” [OR WILL HE]
Story: The “infamous house on Lockwood Lane” is a place where serial killer Lester Morgan – aka The Clown Killer – performed his gruesome deeds. But Morgan claims voices told him to kill…just another murderer looking for a psych verdict? Well, Our Gang over at The Otherside decide to look into that, by locking themselves into the house overnight. After a little light B&E, Dylan, Kai, and Harper settle in, with Kel directing them from their van/headquarters. Hey, anyone see that clown-y shadow in the mirror over there? No? Oh, I’m sure that’s nothing. Let’s start the live stream – grab that Ouija board and let’s do this!
Subgenre: WHY ARE YOU GOING IN THERE Supernatural House Horror
Release Date: 2022
FX: Excellent blood FX and use of lighting/reflections
Some Clichés/Tropes: House With A Past, Oops Possessed Maybe, Unbelievers Faking Fakery, Faulty Tech, Social Media Shenanigans
Where I Watched: Screener (but available through Amazon Prime, and free to watch on Tubi)
I absolutely love everything Grady Hendrix has written. So when I found out that this book was getting an onscreen adaptation? I was stoked. And it’s almost here! (It’ll be officially on Amazon Prime on the 30th…) Synopsis!
In 1988 best friends Abby and Gretchen navigate boys, pop culture and a paranormal force clinging to Gretchen. With help from a mall exorcist, Abby is determined to compel the demon back to the pits of hell — if it doesn’t kill Gretchen first.
Ready? Let’s go!
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Ooh – it’s almost Spoopy Season! Can you taste the fear? You will if you’re in for this screening! Synopsis!
After witnessing a bizarre, traumatic incident involving a patient, Dr. Rose Cotter (Sosie Bacon) starts experiencing frightening occurrences that she can’t explain. As an overwhelming terror begins taking over her life, Rose must confront her troubling past in order to survive and escape her horrifying new reality.
Ready? Let’s go!
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“What the hell is that?” [Dude, I feel you.]
Genre: Space Wrecks
Release Date: 2022
Where I Watched: HBOMAX
Gist: There’s the moon, right? And moon has astronauts that visit, ya with me? But what if – hear me out – the moon is hollow, and there’s A ALIEN inside, throwing the orbit off, which could wreck our planet? Why alien do this thing now? Why not? Pass me that popcorn, my friend.
Talky talk: Moonfall feels like Roland Emmerich got wasted on Mad Dog, then immediately produced his “wouldn’t it be hilarious if” moonage fever dream. The screenplay feels like a first year film student’s Wattpad fic that was used, unedited. Tapping into every cheesy dialogue trope and exposition dump extravaganza, Emmerich bath-salts his way through it all, tossing everything possible at the screen, making sure that the run time goes past two hours for maximum crazy. AND IT IS MARVELOUS.
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Wanna see a film based on the Agojie, aka the REAL LIFE Dora Milaje? Yes, so do I. I knew you were cool. Synopsis!
Set in the 19th century in the African kingdom of Dahomey, The Woman King follows the all-female group of warriors, the Agojie, who protect the kingdom. The group’s general Nanisca trains a new generation of warriors to fight against an enemy who wants to destroy their way of life.
Ready? Let’s go!
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“Don’t fuck this up for all of us, dear.”
Story: Evie is a talented pottery ceramics artist, but she’s barely scraping by after her mother’s death several months ago. So when her friend nabs her a free DNA test swag bag from their latest catering gig? Evie figures why not give it a whirl. Bingo – a second cousin, pops up almost immediately. They meet, as he’s in NYC, and before you know it, Evie is headed to an all-expenses paid vacay in the English countryside. Seems there’s an ultra-posh wedding this weekend, and what better time to meet the whole fam? But things start feeling creepy, and it’s not just the super-Gothic décor ’round the place. At least “call me Walt”, the owner of the FREAKING CASTLE the wedding is to be held, is smoking hot, and seems to be really into Evie. So that’s a plus, right? Right?
Genre I’d put it in: 21st Century Spins On Classics
Release Date: 2022
Remake, Sequel, Based-On, or Original: Based on the characters from Dracula, by Bram Stoker. With a little bit of Ready or Not and Rebecca, for good measure.
Gotta say: Don’t listen to the haters. Invitation is an absolute blast, as long as you keep your expectations where they should be. And where they should be is firmly in the “over-the-top horror goodness” camp. Because oh honey, this film is campy, and the whole cast and crew knows it. So buckle up buttercup, and enjoy the fun.
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Got a dollar to spare? A quarter?
Atomic Fangirl 