#31in31 2017: Hell House LLC

“When anybody asks me what happened at Hell House, I say watch the video. You tell me.”

Story: A friendly gang of millennials who run Halloween horror houses decide to strike out from the big cities and head to Abbadon, PA. Their horror “haunt” that year is now known as the “2009 Haunted House Tour Tragedy”. Five years after what happened, an investigative reporter and her trusty cameraman find a survivor, who gives them the security and for-the-record tapes she’d held on to.  Roll that beautiful horror footage y’all!  I’m sure nothing bad will happen.

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“Happy Death Day” – a movie definitely worth celebrating

Nutshell:  Fun, freaky and sometimes frightening, this movie blends horror and comedy expertly.  Kudos to the director, screenwriter, and the amazing Jessica Rothe as the coed who keeps getting killed.  You won’t find a better multiplex movie to celebrate Friday the 13th.  So what are you waiting for? Grade: A

“Prime vag, OUT!”

Story: Tree Gelbman is a total bitch.  Just hateful.  So when someone kills her on her birthday, it’s no real surprise.  But when she starts re-living that day – and that death – over and over again? Surprise! Continue reading

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#31in31 2017 – ScreenPrism’s Halloween Tropes Explained: Final Girl & Death by Sex

What better way to celebrate an October Friday the 13th than with a little digging into the slasher genre?

ScreenPrism – an amazing YouTube channel you should be watching on the regular – did a deep dive into two of the prized tropes of this subgenre, the “Final Girl” and the beloved “Death by Sex”.  They breakdown these prominent slasher tropes, and provide tons of examples.

Give it a watch, and then sit back and really watch those F13 flicks tonight.

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#31in31 2017 – The Houses October Built

What’chu mean ‘back woods’?

Story: 5 friends on a haunted house road trip, looking for the “real, ultimate” haunt experience. They want extreme, they’ll get it…whether they want it or not.

Scares: A few, but mostly it’s a big question mark.

Splat factor: Beyond haunted house props? Zero.

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Baltimore Screening Pass-palooza: “The Snowman”!

Oh man y’all.  I’ve been stoked about this film ever since I saw the trailer this summer.  So spooky!  So crime-procedural-y!  Two great tastes, right?  Exactly.  Synopsis!

When an elite crime squad’s lead detective (Fassbender) investigates the disappearance of a victim on the first snow of winter, he fears an elusive serial killer may be active again.  With the help of a brilliant recruit (Ferguson), the cop must connect decades-old cold cases to the brutal new one if he hopes to outwit this unthinkable evil before the next snowfall.

Ready to come with me to the chilly side of the street?  Let’s go!

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“War for the Planet of the Apes” – scene comparison shots!

War for the Planet of the Apes is being released on digital soon. So to celebrate that, have a look at some “during the shoot” and “on the screen” comparison shots. Really cool, right? RIGHT.

I loved this movie, and can’t wait to check out the behind-the-scenes goodness on the Blu-ray.  ‘Til then?  Watch these vids downloaded by An Englishman In San Diego! (Why not from my YouTube? Because my Chromebook hates electronic press kits, apparently.)


 

 

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#31in31 2017 – “Wes Craven Presents: They”

“This is getting ridiculous.”

Story: A guy who had night terrors as a kid kills himself in front of his childhood bestie who’s now a psych grad student. At his funeral, she meets two other twenty-somethings who also used to have night terrors… Except “They” have come back. Oh, and bestie had ’em too way back in the day. But I’m sure she’s got nothing to worry about. Hey WHAT’S IN THE CLOSET???  (Hint: definitely not R. Kelly.)

Scares: A few incredibly effective ones at the start and finish, but it’s typical jump scares for the rest of the film.

Splat factor: Very little. Most is only suggested, and shown in extreme shadow.

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#31in31 2017 – The Cell

“I came to help you.”

Story: Child psychologist Catharine Deane is able to enter the minds of comatose patients, thanks to a high-tech “Neurological Cartography and Synaptic Transfer System”. But when serial killer Carl Stargher falls into a coma-like state, the FBI asks Deane to enter the mind of the killer and find Stargher’s latest victim…before it’s too late.

Scares: Chilling imagery, especially of Stargher’s victims. Disturbing and unsettling, and quite a bit creepy.

Splat factor: Middling. Though the horror here is mostly psychological, there’s definitely some red stuff in the mindscape scenes.

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Baltimore Screening Pass-palooza: Goodbye Christopher Robin!

I adore Piglet.  He’s just such a cutie.  In fact, the whole gang is adorable…but I do have a certain soft spot for that quiet, soft-spoken little guy.  And while I know that the whole Winnie The Pooh series was based on the toys A.A. Milne’s son loved, I’ve always wanted to know more.  And in Goodbye Christopher Robin we get it.  Synopsis!

GOODBYE CHRISTOPHER ROBIN gives a rare glimpse into the relationship between beloved children’s author A. A. Milne (Domhnall Gleeson) and his son Christopher Robin (Will Tilston), whose toys inspired the magical world of Winnie-the-Pooh.  Along with his mother Daphne (Margot Robbie), and his nanny Olive (Kelly Macdonald), Christopher Robin and his family are swept up in the international success of the books; the enchanting tales bringing hope and comfort to England after the First World War.   But with the eyes of the world on Christopher Robin, what will the cost be to the family?

Ready to bring your favorite well-loved stuffed animal to the theater?  Let’s go! Continue reading

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#31in31 2017 – “The Green Inferno”

You risked your life for a fucking photo shoot?

Story: college kids follow a charismatic environmentalist into the Amazon to help save the rainforest from illegal development. But when their plane crashes, these kids end up invited to dinner by the local indigenous tribe… OF CANNIBALS. *da duuuum*

Scares: Not many. It’s mostly…

Splat factor: …splatter. Think a re-imagining of Cannibal Holocaust for modern audiences. Continue reading

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