Off the Shelf: Aliens/Vampirella (hardcover collection)

aliens vampirella coverStory: Humans on Mars!  The first colony of sunlight dwellers make their mark on Mars.  Perhaps too much of a mark.  In digging down into the red soil, they happened upon an underground city that used to be inhabited by Nosferatu.  Vampirella visits the station to investigate, and lend assistance if necessary.  But things seem to be quiet.  Too quiet.  Hey, what are those leathery pods?  Are they hatching?  Maybe you picked a bad time to help out a space-station, Vampi…

Best Line: “But I don’t want to be a creature of the night!”

Thoughts: This might be my favorite horror mash-up yet.  Beautiful art, drop-dead gorgeous colors, and a story that actually makes sense.  With Corinna Sara Bechko’s story, I could see how Vampi and the Xenomorphs would meet, and it’s totally believable. And even though this is only a six issue mini, there’s a level of characterization that many long-running series could definitely be jealous of.  Actually, should really, really be jealous of.  Bechko also weaves in prejudices and the fear of Other, how individuals deal with death (particularly their own imminent demise), and the lengths people will go to protect their own.  All the while avoiding the typical “why’d you do that?” idiocy so many horror stories tend to grab at with both hands. Continue reading

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Baltimore Screening Pass-palooza: The Legend of Tarzan!

legend of tarzan onesheetOh man.  This looks really good.  As in, wow the set design is amazing, and the CGI is on freakin’ point.  And also, au naturel Alexander Skarsgård people.  THIS IS NOT A DRILL.  Trailer.  Watch it.  Tell me this won’t be a lot of fun.  I’m betting it will be.  And in this film, Alexander is just reminding me that my current gym workout is weak.  So weak. Synopsis!

THE LEGEND OF TARZAN is a sweeping action-adventure that tells a story or Tarzan beyond what you know.  This is the compelling origin story of Tarzan, a man raised by nature who ultimately rules it while also trying to protect his loved ones.

A big, beautiful, epic film with amazing special effects, extraordinary music as well as beats of humor and romance, THE LEGEND OF TARZAN stars Alexander Skarsgård as Tarzan and Margot Robbie as Jane, his soulmate who is no damsel in distress.   The film’s stellar cast includes Samuel L. Jackson, Djimon Hounsou with Jim Broadbent and Christoph Waltz.

The film is directed by David Yates who directed four of the Harry Potter films. THE LEGEND OF TARZAN opens in theaters worldwide on Friday, July 1 in 3D, 2D and IMAX 3D.

I’m digging that Tarzan also has Margot Robbie (aka Harley Quinn in the soon to be released Suicide Squad, and someone I’m digging more and more each day), and that it looks like it actually has a plot.  (Let us not speak of Tarzan the Ape Man.) Passes?  Right this way…

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#MarketingWinOfTheWeek: “Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates” + The Knot = #NSFWeddings

Mike and Dave Wedding Dates onesheetOh.  My.  God.  Becky.  Whoever came up with this tie-in should get a gold plated bottle of tequila.  (Or a corner office.  Whatevs.)

The movie Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates teamed up with the “oh thank God they’re doing their wedding 411 online” gurus The Knot.  And it’s awesome.  Know how I know?  PEEP THIS.  Know anyone who just isn’t safe around free cake and booze?  Add ’em to the #NSFW website, where they’re making a poster collage of all the cool people I’d party with wedding-time human train wrecks.  And check out the NSFW (Not Safe For WEDDINGS) infographic after the jump!

Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates stumbles into your reception uninvited on July 8th, 2016.

https://www.facebook.com/plugins/video.php?href=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.facebook.com%2FMikeAndDaveMovie%2Fvideos%2F1744129689158176%2F&show_text=1&width=560

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“Attacking the Darkness” – a mockumentary where religion and RPGs collide

attacking the darkness

Nutshell: with cinematography and sound that definitely doesn’t scream “Shoestring Indie”, Attacking the Darkness gives a knowing wink to mockumentary fans and RPG aficionados.  There are definite echoes of Christopher Guest films like For Your Consideration and Waiting for Guffman, though Darkness doesn’t have that same biting wit.  Instead, Darkness gives more of a real-life vibe for their characters.  Well, except for Harmony.  She’s nuts. Recommended viewing for you next beer-fest with your tabletop buds.  Grade: B+

“I’ve been trying to witness during work, but it’s hard to multitask.”

Back in the 80s, I remember hearing about how D&D was gonna send us all to hell.  Don’t pass Go, don’t collect $200.  Just a rocket straight down to the abyss.  Kids like me shrugged and continued rolling our d20.  But glibness aside, the “Satanic Panic” of the 80s was all too real, and while I was able to laugh it off back in school, I’m betting some adults weren’t laughing.  There were folks who thought religious people thinking that games would lead to demonic possession were idiots bent on a theological world order, and religious fundamentalists who thought they were saving the world by screaming about magic and damnation.  Same kinda thing happened back when Harry Potter first became a phenomenon (though apparently there are still “true believers” out there), but not to the extent of those crazy 80s nutters that thought the world was ending because I enjoyed painting miniatures. Continue reading

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Pony News: MLPFiM folks coming to Baltimore Comic-Con! Cider for everybody!

BaltimoreComicCon_logo_nodateBronyCon is in two weeks; are you psyched?  I am!  But if you’re looking for MOAR PONE, look no further than Baltimore Comic-Con; they’ve got Katie Cook, Andy Price, Nei Ruffino, Chad Thomas, and Thom Zahler coming to Baltimare September 2nd-4th! I know, right?  20% cooler, y’all.

Two times the pony fun, so let’s get down with our bad selves.  Read on for the full deets, everypony!
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Columbia Screening Pass-palooza: Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates!

Mike and Dave Wedding Dates onesheetNo.  I’m not throwing out a request for some pals with that title.  It’s a movie, and it looks like a hoot.  Synopsis!

Hard-partying brothers Mike (Adam Devine) and Dave (Zac Efron) place an online ad to find the perfect dates (Anna Kendrick, Aubrey Plaza) for their sister’s Hawaiian wedding. Hoping for a wild getaway, the boys instead find themselves outsmarted and out-partied by the uncontrollable duo.

With a foursome like Kendrick, Efron, Devine and Plaza, it’s sure to be a hoot.  Seen the trailer?  I’d say this is a two-margarita screening for sheer WOOT WOOT value, but perhaps the movie itself will be funky enough…  Passes!  Now!

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2017 Halloween ComicFest titles announced! Zombie Tramp! Black Eyed Kids! Afterlife With Archie! MOAR!

Halloween ComicFest 2016 bannerIt’s the moooost wonderful tiiiiiime of the yeeear… No, not right now.  I’m talking Halloween!  Ghoulies, ghosties, long-legged beasties, and free comics!  That’s right, Halloween ComicFest has announced the freebies for their yearly giveaway – this year it’s on October 29th, 2016 – and they’re looking pretty sweet.

My personal faves?  Well, obviously the titles I’ve listed above (ZOMG Archie – yipee!) But Wraithborn, Haunted Mansion, Tomie, Evil Dead 2, the amazing Ghastly Award-winning Harrow County, and is that Darth Vader Doctor Aphra?  Yes.  Yes it is.  There’s even a Carpenter mini-comic, which really stokes me, as last year’s Tales for a Halloween Night also won a Ghastly.  Can’t wait to see what they’ve got in store for ComicFest!

Pony pals take note: there wasn’t a MLP freebie last Halloween.  But they’re making up for it this year with My Little Pony: The Haunted Dungeon!  I.  Cannot.  WAIT.

Never fear; there’s plenty for the little one’s too; My Little Pony is just the tip of the kiddie iceburg.   Read on for the full deets!

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“Central Intelligence” – fun, embarrassing and goofy. Just like high school.

Central Intelligence onesheet

Nutshell: Hart and Johnson make a great team in Central Intelligence, a film that focuses on the funny and puts the serious business of espionage on the back burner.  That’s a good thing; here, it’s the connection (real or perceived) between the two characters that drives the film.  That, and some wicked-cool dance moves.  A bit too implausible at times, even for a comedy, and there’s a sense of missed connection with these characters..  But the unflinching look at how your experiences in high school can shape who you become grounds the film.  Grade: B

Ever wonder what you could have been after high school?  Or maybe you’re wondering what life will hold for you once you switch that tassel from right to left?  Well, you may not be as badass as Dwayne Johnson’s superspy Bob Stone, but you probably didn’t go through his particular high school hell either.  (At least I hope you didn’t.)  Bob, who in high school was overweight, awkward, and so became the class pariah, grew up and bulked up.  Twenty years later, he seeks out “his only friend” from high school, 1996’s BMOC Calvin “Golden Jet” Joyner (Kevin Hart).  Why?  Because Calvin was kind to Bob when Bob needed him the most.  Of course, there’s a hidden agenda; Bob knows that Calvin is an amazing accountant, and needs Calvin’s help cracking some files. Meanwhile, Calvin, who feels he hit his peak in high school and went downhill from there, is less than thrilled at the possibility of getting in deep with a possible rogue CIA agent.  Yep.  Seems Bob may be trying to pull one over on Calvin so Bob can sell out the good ol’ U.S. of A.  Cue the buddy comedy! Continue reading

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“Finding Dory” – adorable in and out of the sea

finding dory onesheet

Nutshell: Finding Dory is a little bit crazier, a little bit goofier, and maybe even a little more heavy-handed than its predecessor. But it’s still got its heart in the right place, and plenty of positive messages mixed in with the fun. Kids will love it, and adults will find themselves LOL’ing right along with them. Grade: A-

What’s it like to lose your family?  Well, Finding Nemo gave kids of all ages a peek at what that’s like, without all of the Bambi heartbreak. Oscar-winner Andrew Stanton (Wall*E, Finding Nemo) delivers another gorgeous look at how important our connections with others are in this world with Finding Dory.  Is it as good as WALL*E or Finding Nemo?  Well, WALL*E is one of my all-time favorite films, so that’s a pretty high bar to clear.  So why don’t I just say that Finding Dory is a fun bit of slapstick rolled around a sweet center of love, family and friendship.  Plus, there’s some killer animation here. * Continue reading

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TrailerWatch: “Almost Christmas” warms you up for the holidays

Almost Christmas 2016 onesheetChristmas in July!  No, that’s not what happens when the a/c goes on a bender…though I do enjoy the cool even though I need to scrape the frost off the cat.  I’m talking about Almost Christmas, an ensemble comedy that’s hitting theaters this fall, and looks like a nice pre-holiday warmup.  Or, one of those “hey, my family’s not so bad” kinda deals.  Synopsis!

A new comedy from writer/director David E. Talbert (Baggage Claim) and producer Will Packer (Ride Along, Think Like a Man series, This Christmas), Almost Christmas tells the festive story of a beloved patriarch who asks his family for one gift this holiday season: to get along. If they can honor that wish and spend five days under the same roof without killing one another, it will be a Christmas miracle.

The all-star cast of Almost Christmas is led by Kimberly Elise, Danny Glover, John Michael Higgins, Romany Malco, Mo’Nique, JB Smoove, Gabrielle Union, Omar Epps, Nicole Ari Parker, Jessie T. Usher and DC Young Fly. http://www.almostchristmasmovie.com

Mo’Nique looks like she is all in with this film, so I can’t wait to see her strut her stuff. Seeing Danny Glover, Gabrille Union and Omar Epps also gives me the happy.

Almost Christmas hits town November 11th, 2016.  Happy birthday-eve to me!

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