Author Archives: Denise

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About Denise

Professional nerd. Lover of licorice.

Movie Review: 12 Years A Slave

Slavery was an abomination.  There.  Easy enough to grasp.  But there’s always some idiot with an argument as to why it was okay.  And the next time you hear some idiot spout off?  Don’t say anything; just plop his vacant … Continue reading →

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31 in 31 intermission: Salem, Massachusetts!

Okay, so I’ve been slack for the past few days. But I have a half-ass good reason; I’ve been to Salem! In October! I know! And because I feel terrible about skipping the past few days (don’t worry, there will … Continue reading →

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31 in 31: The Devil’s Carnival

“I’m not in the business of murdering innocent children. That’s God’s jurisdiction.” – The Devil Story: Three people head to bloody ends, but then suddenly find themselves in a strange carnival where they’re forced to relive what they did wrong … Continue reading →

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31 in 31: Attack of the Crab Monsters

Story: Fallout from nuclear bomb testing = too much radiation on a tiny island. Too much radiation on a tiny island = giant mutant crabs hungry for human brains! Scares: Only when you see the cheesy crab monster, complete with … Continue reading →

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31 in 31: The Frighteners

Story: You know the one about the guy who can actually see ghosts, but uses them to scam folks? But then gets in over his head when a really sinister force – maybe the Grim Reaper itself – threatens his … Continue reading →

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31 in 31: Monsters Inside Me

Story: You just live your life, doing your thing. Suddenly, you’re attacked! By things you can’t see. Because they’re inside you. BRAIIIIIINS! Scares: Aplenty. You may never want to eat, drink or go anywhere ever again. Splat factor: Tons, but … Continue reading →

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31 in 31: Stake Land

Story: A plague has broken out. People turn into vampires, and they’re hungry. A young boy is saved by a mysterious stranger called Mister, and together with a few other survivors, they look for “New Eden”. Unfortunately, vamps aren’t the … Continue reading →

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31 in 31: Friday the 13th (1980)

Story: We are the CITs so pity us. The kids are brats, the food is hideous! We’re gonna smoke and drink and fool around! We’re…oh wait. No, not Camp North Star. Camp Crystal Lake. And these guys are dooooooomed. Scares: … Continue reading →

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31 in 31: Nosferatu (1922)

Story:  Just a guy.  Standing over a girl.  Trying to bite her neck.  Sounds like Dracula?  Of course not!  *pauses*  Why, do you think they’ll sue? Scares: Surprisingly effective for a silent film.  Echoes of my earlier review of The … Continue reading →

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31 in 31: Room 237

Story: Film historians & other interested parties people with way too much time on their hands obsess over minutiae in Kubrick’s The Shining. Scares: Only the fact that people go frame by frame to find a scene where an actor’s … Continue reading →

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