TrailerWatch: “HOW TO TRAIN YOUR DRAGON: THE HIDDEN WORLD” brings beards, love and a new Big Bad

Posted on June 7, 2018 by Denise

OMGOMGOMG y’all – I love the HtTYD movies. Love them. Toothless is Best Dragon ever (all apologies, Puff, Smaug and Drogon.)

But with this new trailer, there’s another adorable feline-esque flyer, the Light Fury. Look at her. LOOK AT HER. She’s gorgeous. Dang DreamWorks, y’all have really upped your animation game. Not just for this new love interest for Toothless, but all around. Check out the flames Hiccup and Toothless step out of! Look at the shine on those dragon scales!

I can’t wait. I just hope 3 won’t be as savagely heartbreaking as 2. What? I’m still not over how they did Valka’s Bewilderbeast. #JusticeForAlpha

How to Train Your Dragon: The Hidden World comes zooming in next year.

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Columbia Screening Pass-palooza – “Jurassic Park: Fallen Kingdom”!

Posted on June 7, 2018 by Denise

Ready to get your dinosaur on? Because I’ve got passes for the Columbia, MD screening of Jurassic Park: Fallen Kingdom! Synopsis!

It’s been four years since theme park and luxury resort Jurassic World was destroyed by dinosaurs out of containment. Isla Nublar now sits abandoned by humans while the surviving dinosaurs fend for themselves in the jungles. When the island’s dormant volcano begins roaring to life, Owen (Chris Pratt) and Claire (Bryce Dallas Howard) mount a campaign to rescue the remaining dinosaurs from this extinction-level event. Owen is driven to find Blue, his lead raptor who’s still missing in the wild, and Claire has grown a respect for these creatures she now makes her mission. Arriving on the unstable island as lava begins raining down, their expedition uncovers a conspiracy that could return our entire planet to a perilous order not seen since prehistoric times.

OOH! Plus, the trailers look epic. So let’s go!

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Columbia Screening Pass-palooza: “Tag”!

Posted on June 5, 2018 by Denise

Remember summer vacation, when we could play all day?  Well, I’ve got passes for Tag, the movie where grown men decide to keep the fun going. Synopsis!

One month every year, five highly competitive friends hit the ground running in a no-holds-barred game of tag they’ve been playing since the first grade—risking their necks, their jobs and their relationships to take each other down with the battle cry “You’re It!”   This year, the game coincides with the wedding of their only undefeated player, which should finally make him an easy target. But he knows they’re coming…and he’s ready.  Based on a true story, “Tag” shows how far some guys will go to be the last man standing.

Ready, set, GO!

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TrailerWatch: Amazon video’s “Suspiria”

Posted on June 4, 2018 by Denise

How can anyone top the great Dario Argento? The reboot of Suspiria aims to be in the same ballpark, and with this new trailer, 2018’s Suspiria hopes to harness the same creepy, stylistic mood of the original classic. Synopsis!

A darkness swirls at the center of a world-renowned dance company, one that will engulf the troupe’s artistic director, an ambitious young dancer, and a grieving psychotherapist. Some will succumb to the nightmare. Others will finally wake up.

This trailer doesn’t do much for me – I’m a die-hard Argento fan, so I’m keeping a skeptical eye open ’til I know more. Right now it feels like a desperate attempt to clone a cult classic. But here’s hoping that with this film, Dakota Johnson gets a film she can really work with. That she’s co-starring with the glorious Tilda Swinton gives me a bit of hope. Not much, but a glimmer. I’ll wait for the next trailer to give final buzz judgemen Suspiria arrives in theaters November 2.

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Vid of the Day: “Divine Bovine” by Gunnar Madsen!

Posted on June 1, 2018 by Denise

I love cows.  They give us cheese.  They’re content with hanging out in a field, noshing on green grass. They’re kinda awesome.  (Unless they have guns.)

I also love music. Who doesn’t? So when I heard that Gunnar Madsen wrote a song called “Divine Bovine”, I had to dig in. Gunnar’s singing protagonist is a dairy cow, and she gives you a peek at her life down on the farm.

Now, this song (and the entire album it’s on, I Am Your Food) is for kids, but I have to admit I got sucked into this song big time. This is a song folks with little ones won’t want to kill themselves after hearing nineteen zillion times (the average number of times a child wants to listen to a song s/he likes)…in fact, I wouldn’t be surprised if families sang this together in the car.  Or in the bath.  Or kitchen.  Or, best yet, on their next trip to a farm.  When in Rome!

“Milk milk, moo moo!”  Your earworm for the day.  YOU’RE WELCOME Y’ALL. Have a wonderful weekend.  And don’t let it bother you.  Be like Cow.

[A review of the whole album is coming down the pike over on The Green Man Review. Of course it’ll be cross-posted here. Keep your bananas peeled!  #seewhatididthere #okayillstop]

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Columbia Screening Pass-palooza: “Hotel Artemis”

Posted on June 1, 2018 by Denise

Ready for some seamy underbelly?  Because I’ve got passes for the Columbia, MD screening of Hotel Artemis! Synopsis!

Set in riot-torn, near-future Los Angeles, HOTEL ARTEMIS is an original, high-octane action-thriller starring Jodie Foster as The Nurse, who runs a secret, members-only hospital for criminals. Jodie Foster is joined by an all-star cast that includes Sterling K. Brown, Sofia Boutella, Jeff Goldblum, Bryan Tyree Henry, Jenny Slate, Zachary Quinto, Charlie Day, and Dave Bautista.

Ready? Let’s go! Continue reading →

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Baltimore Screening Pass-palooza: “Ocean’s 8”!

Posted on May 30, 2018 by Denise

Ready for some heist shenanigans? Because I’ve got passes for the B’more screening of Ocean’s 8, and I’m gonna share ’em with ya! But first? Synopsis!

Five years, eight months, 12 days…and counting. That’s how long Debbie Ocean (Sandra Bullock) has been devising the biggest heist of her life. She knows what it’s going to take—a team of the best in their field, starting with her partner-in-crime Lou Miller (Cate Blanchett). Together, they recruit a crew of specialists: jeweler Amita (Mindy Kaling); street con Constance (Awkwafina); expert fence Tammy (Sarah Paulson); hacker Nine Ball (Rihanna); and fashion designer Rose (Helena Bonham Carter). The target is a cool $150 million dollars in diamonds—diamonds that will be around the neck of world-famous actress Daphne Kluger (Anne Hathaway), who will be centerstage at the event of the year, the Met Gala. The plan is rock solid, but everything will need to be flawless if the team is going to get in and get away with the ice. All in plain sight.

Let’s go!

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“Solo”: Perhaps not the origin story we were looking for, but it works

Posted on May 24, 2018 by Denise

Nutshell: A fast paced rock ’em, sock ’em actioner that introduces a young Han Solo to the Star Wars universe. While folks who are looking for lots of links to cannon may be disappointed, moviegoers who don’t mind a cursory peek at young Han  (AND LANDO!!!11!) will definitely be entertained.  Grade: B

“Kashyyykian Moof-Milker!”

Story: Some guy grows up on the streets, stealing and conning to get by. Meets a tall fuzzy bloke, a guy who really digs capes, and a crew of smugglers. But one big score – with a woman from the past – could put them all on easy street. I’m sure it’ll be a piece of cake.

Genre I’d put it in: Fun But Fluffy Origin Tale

Remake, Sequel, Based-On, or Original: Based on the Star Wars universe. An origin story for Han Solo.  Obviously. Second in a planned Star Wars anthology series. Continue reading →

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Elsewhere Review: Mast Sea Salt Chocolate

Posted on May 20, 2018 by Denise
From this week’s edition of The Green Man Review. Read the original post here!

Lately, sea salt is in everything I adore. Caramels, brittle, toffee, peanut butter cups.  And, of course, chocolate bars. When I was given a bar of Mast, I figured it’d be the same ol’ same ol; a chocolate bar that headlines sea salt, but only gives nibblers a faint echo of the stuff.

But Mast has found a perfect balance of deep dark chocolate and crisp sea salt goodness.  It’s not overpowering, yet the salt does make its presence known. There are loads of salt crystals scattered throughout, though in order to get the pretty salt sparkle you’ll need to turn the bar over and look at the back. Continue reading →

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“Book Club” – boilerplate made beautiful by a great cast

Posted on May 18, 2018 by Denise

Nutshell: Enjoyable lightweight romantic comedy for Boomers and anyone else interested in seeing characters face romantic challenges rather than simply hopping into the sack. Keaton, Fonda, Bergen and Steenburgen need to be in more movies together; they make a great team. Grade: B

“I’m not even sure this qualifies as a ‘book’.”

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