Category Archives: Movie Reviews

“First Man” crashes and burns

Nutshell: Shakeycam, choker-shots and Dutch angles rule the day in this dispassionate biopic. Director Damien Chazelle tries to shove Importance down viewers throats, but only manages greatness during the awe-inspiring moon landing. I came away with a headache, and the thought … Continue reading

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#31in31 2018 – “Zoombies”

“This is strange.” Story: Small monkeys become infected with a virus that turns them into…wait for it… ZOOMBIES! (badum-tish) I sure hope they don’t get out and infect the entire zoo. What would the small crew of pre-opening staff do … Continue reading

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#31in31 2018: “Hell Fest”

“You’re the one who’s been following me around all night, aren’t you?” Story: A college gal who’s more study than stupor heads back home to spend Halloween with her BFF. But BFF and her in-town pals have tickets to Hell … Continue reading

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#31in31 2018 – “Bedeviled” (2016)

“What the fuck?” Story: Some random chick dies in a cut to black, and her random friends get “invited” to download an app…from their dead friend. Whoooo! But naturally these idiots download the app anyway. Will they all die one … Continue reading

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#31in31 2018 – “Starve”

“I’m a fucking brown belt, bitch!” Story: I’m a writer! I need to experience things in order to write about them! So, girlfriend and bro, let’s go check out a Florida sinkhole in the middle of nowhere, and search for … Continue reading

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#31in31 2018 – “Prom Night” (1980)

“Kill! The killer’s gonna get you!” Story: Six years ago, a young girl was killed in a horrible accident. The kids that inadvertently caused her fall vow to never tell anyone what happened… Time for Alexander Hamilton High’s senior prom! … Continue reading

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“Venom” – fun but flawed

Nutshell: Tom Hardy is fantastic as Eddie Brock/Venom. But while there’s lots of action and plenty of incredible FX, the story is a bunch of clichés strung together. Go for the fun zap-pow, but leave your brain at home. Grade: C “Fuck … Continue reading

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#31in31 2018 – “Office” (2015)

“Who are you?” Story: A mild mannered Korean salaryman goes home to his family… And slaughters them. Why? Nobody seems to know. Meanwhile, his mercilessly bullied intern stresses about being hired full-time, and a police detective seems to be getting … Continue reading

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#31in31 2018: “Cabin Fever 2: Spring Fever”

“Laugh it off man, this ain’t shit.” Story: The survivor of the original Fever made it out (relatively) alive, hooray! He swam in a river and came out the other side. But don’t get attached. Instead, wonder what happens to … Continue reading

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“A Star Is Born” (2018) – a riveting remake

Nutshell: THAT’S how it’s done. An amazing remake by first-time director Cooper that’s full of the sturm, drang and achingly beautiful moments we expect from this classic story. He’s got his work cut out for him with his next film; Star … Continue reading

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