Tag Archives: Bad Horror Movies

#31in31 2017 – “Wes Craven Presents: They”

“This is getting ridiculous.” Story: A guy who had night terrors as a kid kills himself in front of his childhood bestie who’s now a psych grad student. At his funeral, she meets two other twenty-somethings who also used to … Continue reading

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#31in31 2017 – “It Follows”

“ZZZZZZ” – me, watching this. Story: So, there’s this It Follows Demon Thing, right? And it follows you (natch) after you have sex with someone it was following. If it catches you, it kills you, and then goes back to … Continue reading

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“Wish Upon” – a drinking game waiting to happen.

Sometimes I’m too lazy for a full-out piece. Sometimes everything I’ve got to say about a film can be summarized in a sentence or two. Sometimes it’s both. So herewith, a quick-n-dirty on…Wish Upon! Nutshell: It’s fun when a horror … Continue reading

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“The Cure for Wellness” is a whole lot of bad crazy. With eels.

Nutshell: Bojan Bazelli’s beautiful cinematography and Eve Stewart’s picture-perfect production design are wasted in this derivative horror mishmosh.  Speaking of criminal wastes of talent, Celia Imrie, Dane DeHaaan and Jason Isaacs turn in wonderful performances that this film just doesn’t … Continue reading

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#31in31 2016: Camp Death

“Realism? Fuck realism!” Story: A film crew tries to make a slasher film, but didn’t expect a real killer to crash the joint. Ooh – so scary! Scares: Zero. Lame concept, lame acting, lame blocking. Angles that leave the action … Continue reading

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#31in31 2016: The Secrets of Emily Blair

“You wanna do good in this world? You gotta get your hands dirty.” Story: A nurse got kissed by some possessed dude.  Gotta hate when that happens.  Meanwhile, her fiance notices things aren’t quite right with his lady.  The trail … Continue reading

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#31in31 2016: Wishmaster 2

“All right. I understand. You’ve had a tough day. I can see how this could get a little depressing in here…” Story: Hey, robbing an art museum sounds like a great idea! Unless you inadvertently release an evil Djinn that … Continue reading

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