Review-in-a-Flash: “Alien: Covenant”

Posted on May 18, 2017 by Denise
Sometimes I’m too lazy for a full-out piece. Sometimes everything I’ve got to say about a film can be summarized in a sentence or two. Sometimes it’s both. So herewith, a quick-n-dirty on Alien: Covenant!

Nutshell: While Covenant abuses the Stupid People Doing Stupid Things trope, meditations on life, humanity, and creation give the story just enough heft to keep things interesting. Covenant answers a few questions left hanging from Prometheus, while giving us more to wonder about for the inevitable next film.  Grade: B

“You hear that?  Nothing.  No birds.  No animals.  Nothing.” Continue reading →

Posted in Movie Reviews, Review In A Flash | Tagged , | Leave a comment

“The Wedding Plan” – an open-hearted story about finding Orthodox love in a non-Orthodox way

Posted on May 18, 2017 by Denise

Nutshell: With hints of Pride and Prejudice and Muriel’s Wedding, The Wedding Plan is a sweet, quirky, and heartfelt look at women, men, marriage, and faith. Faith in yourself, faith in your family and friends, and faith that everything will turn out okay.  That this has an Orthodox spin on things only adds depth and honesty to a lovely story. An honest, beautifully crafted look at life, love and longing.  Grade: A

“How long can I date?”

Story: Michal, an Orthodox Jewish woman living in Jerusalem, is getting married!  One small problem; her fiance ended things, and so there’s no groom.  But Michal has faith that a groom will appear by her wedding date.  Full steam ahead! Continue reading →

Posted in 7 Pieces Of, Movie Reviews | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

TrailerWatch: “47 Meters Down” great whites makes it hard to catch your breath

Posted on May 18, 2017 by Denise

“I can’t even see what’s below me…”

Just the premise of this film has me gasping; what if you were trapped underwater in a shark cage, as great white sharks circled above you?  Yeah.  Feel it?  Uh huh.  That’s 47 Meters Down, and it sounds like a (great) white-knuckle of a time.  Synopsis!

On the rebound after a devastating break-up, Lisa (Mandy Moore) is ready for adventure while on vacation in Mexico. Even still, she needs a little extra persuasion when her daring sister Kate (Claire Holt) suggests they go shark diving with some locals. Once underwater in a protective cage, Lisa and Kate catch a once in a lifetime, face-to-face look at majestic Great Whites. But when their worst fears are realized and the cage breaks away from their boat, they find themselves plummeting to the bottom of the seabed, too deep to radio for help without making themselves vulnerable to the savage sharks, their oxygen supplies rapidly dwindling. 47 METERS DOWN is a terrifying tale of survival set in the domain of the ocean’s fiercest creatures.

All I can say is that they better not do anything to Rebecca Pearson, dammit! Hear me now!

47 Meters Down da-dummms into theaters June 16th, 2017.

Posted in Trailers | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Baltimore Screening Pass-palooza: “Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales”!

Posted on May 17, 2017 by Denise

Two can keep a secret if one of them is dead, amirite?  Well, that certainly sounds like the golden rule in the fifth film of the Pirates of the Caribbean series – and with Javier Bardem as the Big Bad in this one, he’s sure to give some good creep… Synopsis!

Johnny Depp returns to the big screen as the iconic, swashbuckling anti-hero Jack Sparrow in the all-new “Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales.” The rip-roaring adventure finds down-on-his-luck Captain Jack feeling the winds of ill-fortune blowing strongly his way when deadly ghost sailors, led by the terrifying Captain Salazar (Javier Bardem), escape from the Devil’s Triangle bent on killing every pirate at sea—notably Jack. Jack’s only hope of survival lies in the legendary Trident of Poseidon, but to find it he must forge an uneasy alliance with Carina Smyth (Kaya Scodelario), a brilliant and beautiful astronomer, and Henry (Brenton Thwaites), a headstrong young sailor in the Royal Navy. At the helm of the Dying Gull, his pitifully small and shabby ship, Captain Jack seeks not only to reverse his recent spate of ill fortune, but to save his very life from the most formidable and malicious foe he has ever faced.

Ready to walk the plank, me hearties?

Continue reading →

Posted in Free Screenings | Tagged , | 1 Comment

TrailerWatch: “The Emoji Movie”, because the Hollywood Idea Factory is dead.

Posted on May 17, 2017 by Denise

I’m guessing the pitch meeting went a little something like this:

“Yeah, a film about emojis.  Yes, the things you use on your phone when you text.  It is completely stupid, but think of the merchandising!”  Aaaaand, sold.

Looks like the usual “become who you are” kids film trope, along with practically every cliche you’ve ever seen in a film aimed at the kid/tween set. But with Poo Emoji, because basic scatological humor is so 2016.

Why does this movie exist?  And Jesus Christ, they got quality talent like T.J. Miller, Anna Faris and SIR PATRICK STEWART to lend their voices. Where’s a headdesk emoji when I need one?

The Emoji Movie hits theaters July 28th, 2017*. And probably hits streaming services two weeks later, max.

*I know the poster says August 8th. Apparently this film isn’t top on the studio’s radar; I’m sure they’ll fix things with a new poster soon. Probably.

Posted in Trailers | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

TrailerWatch: “Transformers: The Last Knight” International Trailer

Posted on May 17, 2017 by Denise

“You want to know, don’t you?  Why they keep coming here?”

Yes.  Yes I do.  Okay I’ll admit it; as much as I adore Michael Bay Go Boom, I’ve been wondering if the Transformers franchise was overreaching with the newest film in the franchise.   But it looks like another fun romp through the wilds of CGI, and hello – ROBOT DINOSAURS.  So what do I think?  I think I’ll be checking it out. Synopsis!

The Last Knight shatters the core myths of the Transformers franchise, and redefines what it means to be a hero. Humans and Transformers are at war, Optimus Prime is gone. The key to saving our future lies buried in the secrets of the past, in the hidden history of Transformers on Earth.  Saving our world falls upon the shoulders of an unlikely alliance: Cade Yeager (Mark Wahlberg); Bumblebee; an English Lord (Sir Anthony Hopkins); and an Oxford Professor (Laura Haddock).

There comes a moment in everyone’s life when we are called upon to make a difference.  In Transformers: The Last Knight, the hunted will become heroes.  Heroes will become villains.  Only one world will survive: theirs, or ours.

 

Transformers: The Last Knight hits theaters June 23rd, 2017.

Posted in Trailers | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

Pony News: Claire Corlett – the voice of Sweetie Belle – coming to BronyCon!

Posted on May 12, 2017 by Denise

OMGOMGOMG – remember when I got excited when Maddy Peters was announced for this year’s BronyCon and wished for a Cutie Mark Crusaders gathering this year?
Well, looks like IT’S GONNA HAPPEN Y’ALL! Claire Corlett (the voice of Sweetie Belle) is coming as well!

That’s right; Maddy Peters (Scootaloo), Michelle Creber (Apple Bloom) and even Brynna Drummond (Babs Seed) are coming to this year’s BronyCon!  Everypony – EVERYPONY – I can’t handle it.  Perhaps it’s best that this year’s ‘con is in August?  I’ve got months to get myself straight…and I’ll need it.

Read on for the full details!
Continue reading →

Posted in Pony News | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Book Review: Kate Moore, The Radium Girls

Posted on May 11, 2017 by Denise

Nutshell:In the same vein as Rebecca Skloot’s The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks, The Radium Girls digs into a forgotten, swept-under piece of history and tells the stories of the women who fought for their rights – and their lives – as the corporations that they worked for continued to say that radium was safe.  A powerful, heartbreaking read.

Story: In the early 20th Century, the United States hired women to paint watch dials.  Paint them with radium.  Now we know that stuff is incredibly dangerous and could kill you…and that’s thanks in large part to the women who worked day and night, painting watches.  And licking the radium-covered brushes so the brush point would be nice and sharp.

“It was a technique called lip-pointing, inherited from the first girls who had worked in the industry, who came from china-painting factories. Unbeknownst to the girls, it wasn’t the way things were done in Europe…” Continue reading →

Posted in Books | Tagged , | 5 Comments

Baltimore Screening Pass-palooza: “BAYWATCH”!

Posted on May 11, 2017 by Denise

Is your body beach ready? (Hint: YES IT IS.) Because I’ve got passes for the screening of Baywatch!  That’s right – head to theaters to see it first.  And they’re calling it “Bae’s Night Out”, and you know what that means.  It means there’ll be cool free merch and maybe even a surprise… So c’mon and catch BAYWATCH in theaters and see all the slow-motion glory with the cutting-edge technology of Dolby Cinema at AMC!! Yeah baby.  You know you want to. Synopsis!

BAYWATCH follows devoted lifeguard Mitch Buchannon (Johnson) as he butts heads with a brash new recruit (Efron). Together, they uncover a local criminal plot that threatens the future of the Bay.

The trailers they’ve been releasing look like a lot of fun, and seem to have tongue planted firmly in cheek.  Which is a great way to pay tribute to the cheesy awesomeness that was Baywatch the TV series.

Now if they’d only get on signing these guys for Baywatch Nights: The Movie… But ’til then, you ready?  Let’s hit it!

Continue reading →

Posted in Free Screenings | Tagged , | 2 Comments

Columbia Screening Pass-palooza: “Everything, Everything”!

Posted on May 10, 2017 by Denise

In the mood for a sweet YA romance?  Well I’ve got you covered; I’ve got passes for Everything, Everything, a tale of a sweet but (literally) closed off girl and the boy next door who adores her. Synopsis!

From Warner Bros. Pictures and Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer Pictures comes “Everything, Everything,” based on the bestselling book by Nicola Yoon, directed by Stella Meghie and starring Amandla Stenberg and Nick Robinson. What if you couldn’t touch anything in the outside world?  Never breathe in the fresh air, feel the sun warm your face…or kiss the boy next door?  “Everything, Everything” tells the unlikely love story of Maddy, a smart, curious and imaginative 18-year-old who due to an illness cannot leave the protection of the hermetically sealed environment within her house, and Olly, the boy next door who won’t let that stop them. Maddy is desperate to experience the much more stimulating outside world, and the promise of her first romance.  Gazing through windows and talking only through texts, she and Olly form a deep bond that leads them to risk everything to be together…even if it means losing everything.

Ready to risk it?  Let’s go! Continue reading →

Posted in Free Screenings | Tagged , | Leave a comment